Re: Matsu Shin

by **Ruby rose** Tue Jun 16, 2015 4:25 am

let's go over this quickly.

Whenever his other personality comes forth, it is always signaled with a spiritual pressure that would make Captain Zaraki sweat greatly, but this is just an assumption by most.

This is a form of GMing even if it is playful alliteration. you do not get to decide how others react to your spiritual pressure.

Secondary: Metal Gauntlets and armored footwear which act as Matsu's defense against melee attacks as well as a way to perform hand to hand combat without his zanpaktou which he is not trained in at all but will do so if necessary.

What metal are these gauntlets made of? Most gauntlets and footwear traditionally made should be understood to be vastly inferior to a zanpakuto and will break quickly if brought in direct contact with one. While, so long as you understand that, I would be fine with these items, you will need to elaborate.

"gauntlets" can mean a variety of different designs with different levels of protection, so define what they look like or what they're styled after. even among the europeans different types existed.
"Armored footwear" is even less descriptive, given that could mean anything from a sabaton to a leather boot, all with varying degrees of coverage, level of protection, and material.

Passiv: Ethereal Darkness. As combat progresses, when Yoake no yugure pulses, some of the black lightning arc off and strike the ground or any other surface and creates a black spot (about a foot in radius) on the ground, these spots act depending on the ability that is used while these spot are in place, but if the opponent gets too close to one (2-5 feet away), it will release the bolt from before and add to the opponents kido reduction and resets the kido strength loss duration. This passive does not affect paralysis duration though despite its electric appearance. Only 5 spots can be active at a time and spots will vanish after zanpaktou returns to sealed-state.

The way this is described sounds dangerously close to an autohit ability. those aren't doable here.
does this take away from your stamina? if not, I'd be dubious at accepting it.

by **SintheReaper** Tue Jun 16, 2015 4:46 am

Ok, I will work on the problems you mentioned and will make them more suited to standards

by **SintheReaper** Tue Jun 16, 2015 5:07 am

Adjustments have been made

by Angus Tue Jun 16, 2015 5:20 pm

The easiest way to create a character that the admins will be fine with is just accepting that your character could die or lose a fight. Your character should be someone that you'd have a good time Roleplaying, not someone that will win almost every fight. That's just what I've learned from my RPing over the years.

by **SintheReaper** Tue Jun 16, 2015 10:27 pm

I see, well im trying to make this character original

by Haruko Sat Jun 20, 2015 7:13 am

Upon further review your current ultimate's a little bit too strong with what it's capable of doing, for a shikai ult. Please change it or convert it to a bankai ultimate.

Ethereal darkness isn't fixed still, your equipment still requires actual description other than "gothic style", since that still is a range of different looks, and while it's not terrible for the sheet be aware even the weakest hollow has about the same amount of issue ripping high-carbon steel as it does Paper.

by **SintheReaper** Sun Jun 21, 2015 7:00 am

Ok haruko, which parts of the ultimate do you say are too strong and which part of Ethereal Darkness needs to be fixed along with what material the gauntlets and boots should be made out of for whenever I research into them they are not very descriptive and only show pictures but I will continue into finding better ways to fix these problems.

Just give me time and some patience along with some helpful info on such matters, I have even tried the bleach wikis yet they weren't as helpful as I hoped they would be.

by **Ruby rose** Wed Jun 24, 2015 2:38 pm

frankly, you'd be hard-pressed to find any gauntlets and boots that don't immediately get cut by a zanpakuto. they are the purified and refined expression of a soul reaper or hollow's spiiritual energy and thus superior even to most Kido in terms of Reishi density and amount.

You also have not answered my question on if Ethereal darkness is an autohit ability in your sheet, either.

by **SintheReaper** Wed Jun 24, 2015 10:25 pm

Oh well OK, so in order to make the gauntlets strong enough to fend off hollows and other soul reapers I would have to make them a part of my zanpaktou pretty much and I guess etheral darkness is an autohit that doesn't do real damage only status effects for it weakens the kido strength of the opponent, it does not do any physical damage, I do believe that it has a certain range that the opponent has to be in order to get struck by it so it is not an actual auto hit if you stay out of its range.

by **Ruby rose** Tue Jul 07, 2015 1:06 pm

Oh well OK, so in order to make the gauntlets strong enough to fend off hollows and other soul reapers I would have to make them a part of my zanpaktou pretty much[/quote]
yeah. though that'd have to be a shikai or bankai ability, as a result.

and I guess etheral darkness is an autohit that doesn't do real damage only status effects for it weakens the kido strength of the opponent, it does not do any physical damage, I do believe that it has a certain range that the opponent has to be in order to get struck by it so it is not an actual auto hit if you stay out of its range.

Except that it comes from "random arcing from your zan" meaning you're generally always going to have one close to you, and it's appearance will not be something your opponent is able to predict or react to.

And while it doesn't do damage but merely debuffs... it's a very harsh debuff and I don't believe it is balanced.

by **SintheReaper** Wed Jul 08, 2015 1:05 am

ah well ok, I would probably make the gauntlets shikai for I have an idea for the bankai, and as for Ethereal darkness I can try to make it so that if it strikes a zanpaktou that has kido type abilities, it will weaken its power as well?

by **SintheReaper** Wed Jul 08, 2015 10:11 am

Ok, I have made some adjustments to the forum again which would be to the equipment, shikai look and abilities, I hope you enjoy it!

by **Ruby rose** Tue Jul 21, 2015 1:37 am

), it can either be applied to the zanpaktous blade so that it may apply either kido strength loss to the opposing zanpaktou or weakens the opponents spiritual connection with their zanpaktou, making the opposing attacks physically weaker (will reduce zanpaktou strength by the same amount as kido strength reduction and kido strength reduction to the opponents zanpaktou is like that to the opponent directly)

Not really a fan of this, especially for a shikai, and especially something that seems to occur if the opponent even blocks with their weapon. It's entirely unacceptable.
other than this, the technique is fine.

(this technique has a hit or miss chance of 50/50 meaning that what would look like a hit may have actually missed like Zantetsuken from Final fantasy, I wouldn't mention it if it wasn't a good example of what im explaining)

please refrain from using chance-based things like that. make your technique miss or hit depending on factors in RP, rather than any stroke of luck, firstly. That aspect is not acceptable.
I also haven't seen Zantetsuken in final fantasy, so this description doesn't help me understand your attack in the slightest.

by **SintheReaper** Tue Jul 21, 2015 8:56 am

I see your point and I also see the problems, and as of the passive, if that section of the effect is removed it can be used?
Also I will think of a different idea for this skill in means of hit or miss statistics and explanation of how it will hit or miss

by **Ruby rose** Mon Jul 27, 2015 1:12 am

If you sufficiently nerf that part of the ability, it will be usable.

by **SintheReaper** Mon Jul 27, 2015 1:17 am

Well I removed the part that drains kido strength of zanpaktou and left the rest be while fixing the chances of the Ultimate technique to have a certain chance depending on how many marks are on the opponent.

by **Ruby rose** Mon Jul 27, 2015 12:33 pm

please refrain from using chance-based things like that. make your technique miss or hit depending on factors in RP, rather than any stroke of luck, firstly. That aspect is not acceptable.

See back to this.
Chance-based attacks are to be refrained from in the RP.

by **SintheReaper** Mon Jul 27, 2015 12:38 pm

I see, I apologize for not understanding earlier, I will make the changes to be more enemy stat based hit or miss if that is more acceptable.

by **SintheReaper** Sat Aug 08, 2015 7:56 am

My Character sheet is done and is ready for yet another review.

by **Ruby rose** Sun Aug 30, 2015 7:35 pm

currently I'm still not willing to approve the super move. hit or miss should depend on what the opponent does, not what their stats are. It's not currently usable right now.
You've been here for a while now, so I'm going to throw you a bone and approve your character. It'll sit in the creation section until you can fix your shikai ultimate, though.

by **Aloysius Koehler** Sun Aug 30, 2015 7:47 pm

2/2 Approval on the basis above.

by **SintheReaper** Sun Aug 30, 2015 8:46 pm

I have decided to get rid of the ultimate since it was giving me the most trouble, hopefully that will fix my problems.

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